A stream of conscious. An small update of this week.
There’s just .. so much.
It’s been reading week this week. I’m attending a one year certificate program for Art Fundamentals, which is basically fine arts smushed into one rushed, unbelievably busy year. It’s going really well, but I’ve been worrying about what happens if I don’t get into my first choice for next year…
So, reading week.
I redid my room. Last year, I was miserable this time of the year. February/March. Which is unbelievably depressing, because my birthday is the second week of March. So my birthday last year.. well I spent it crying over champagne and dinner with my family. So in a fit, I rearranged my room. Cleaning helps me remove all the grime from my brain, so sometimes I have fits of it.
So, it being reading week and the lurk of darkness creeping in on me, I went to Ikea, bought some new stuff and actually transformed my room into a place where I can do my art and read and be comfortable and allow myself to be whole without needing the unexistent presence of whoever. And it’s been so wonderful. I feel .. happy and I feel .. whole and I really am so pleased that it’s thanks to me, and not to whoever. I hope that everyone gets to experience this.
I need to record this, ’cause Tuesday was literally the best day in far too long(aside from the fact that I have been battling an awful, awful cold). I read wonderful, and brilliantly written fanfiction and emersed myself in Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell that has been sitting on my bookshelf since Christmas. I ordered pizza, sat up a laptray on my bed and read back and forth and ate pizza untill 4 in the morning and goddamn if I wasn’t the happiest I’ve been in far too long. And yesterday I ordered 150$ worth of Sherlock merch from Etsy, and at least one item will get here in time for my birthday and the thought of that just makes me so damn happy. And there isn’t really much more that I can say to explain how wonderful this second last week of being 19 years old has been.
But now, on this Friday evening, I must dive back into my homework, as I have many projects to do that are due next week, which really really stinks but I seriously have to at least try getting started. Right.
All mine and all yours,